Frequently Asked Questions (OAIN)
What if I feel uncomfortable about being nude during the session?
First, realize that often the primary basis of this inquiry relates to feelings of inadequacy and vulnerability. While these
are issues with which you must come to terms on your own, rest assured that they are more common than you could possibly imagine.
So many people who feel that they are not "body perfect" fail to realize that this description fits only
a very, very small percentage of the population. There are many instances when a great deal of self-acceptance can be achieved
if we just learn to overcome this stumbling block. Bodies come in all shapes, sizes and colors with a vast array of endowments
and physical attributes. Know from the very beginning that I am not here to "pass judgement" on you or
to compare your physique with (so-called) "better-than"s. In my opinion, they simply don't exist. As
to the vulnerability aspect, this is the reason that I offer you the option of me being nude during your session as well.
This sort of removes the stratus from the experience, operating on the same level (so to speak). Every effort
is made to make you feel comfortable and at ease during your session for obvious reasons: the moe relaxed you are, the more
you will enjoy and benefit from your experience. If you still have reservations about nudity, we can perform the
session with either or both of us being partially clothed. I remind you that the room is kept very dimly lit, since I need
a minimum of light to perform the session. Of course, we can further discuss these issues prior to the start of your session
and operate according to your greatest degree of comfort.
What happens if I get an erection during the session?
Believe it or not, I am just as often presented with the opposing inquiry, "What happens if I don't get one?"
To be absolutely honest with you, in the 20+ years that I have been practicing massage therapy, I could probably count
on the fingers of one hand the number of times when I had a client who did not experience an erection at some point throughout
the session. First of all, realize that if what you are seeking is a "quick back rub / hand job," you'd
probably do better searching elsewhere for someone to satisfy those needs. However, if what you are looking
for is: * a chance to access and nurture your entire physical, psychological, mental, spiritual and emotional being;
* an opportunity to address and resolve tensions and stress; * to become better acquainted with your own personal
energies and feelings ; and * to explore these energies and feelings in a nurturing, supportive and caring environment
...then we have a fantastic opportunity to share a wonderful experience with one another. I firmly
believe that your genitals and your sexual physiology are as integral to your being as your heart and your lungs and your
neck, arms, and little toes. They are a part of your body - a part of your being - that perhaps have received too little
or too much attention without balancing their needs with those of the remainder of your body. I am not going to
ignore any part of your body unless you specifically request it. Your genitals will be treated with the same respect and
the same reverence as any other part of your body. It is quite common for men to feel uncomfortable when experiencing
an erection in the presence of a stranger. I simply allow it to be a part of the experience. I honor it and treat it as
such.
Is this a "sexual" massage?
Brace yourself. All massage has a sexual aspect, whether people are aware of it or not—and, trust me, most people
are. Massage therapists are whole beings and we take our sexuality, along with our intellect and emotions, into everything
we do. We, like everyone else, cannot divorce ourselves from an aspect of our very being.
But the fact that a sexual
component is present in a massage doesn’t mean that the session necessarily will culminate in a sexual act. While it
is impossible not to communicate during a massage, it is possible to misconstrue or be unaware. The body is a veritable minefield
of erogenous zones. This is an area where I believe the client and I have a shared responsibility for accurate communication
of boundaries.
Is it appropriate for me (the client) to touch you or to talk with you during the session?
Realize that if during the course of the experience you feel you have a need to share and re-circulate the energy which
you are enjoying with me, that it could actually be very uncomfortable for you not to make physical contact with me.
Some
men feel comfortable touching or caressing my legs as I move about the table. For others, any type of physical contact serves
the purpose of completing that cycle of energy. However, I do remind you that if you feel that by touching me, you are detracting
from your own "receiving" of the energy, then I recommend that you simply lie there, relax and enjoy the experience.
With
regards to verbal communication during the session, I reference an old saying that goes, "Grunting and groaning are permitted,
welcomed and highly encouraged."
Most men find that they are so "in" to the experience that they have no need or desire
to do anything but enjoy it. But feedback is always welcomed and appreciated.
I do keep a good supply of duct tape available if a client gets too "handy".
What happens if I begin to become aroused to the point of orgasm?
At this point it is important to clarify the differentiation between experiencing an orgasm and the process of ejaculation
(speaking particularly of men in this context). Quite frequently, people transpose and/or confuse the two terms and processes.
Ejaculation is the physical release of the seminal fluid and all of its components, a process usually brought
about by a state of arousal. For most men, once you have ejaculated, you experience an anti-climax as ejaculation usually
releases that climatic energy from the body. On the other hand, an orgasm is the actual apex, or pinnacle, or peak
of the arousal energy. Sometimes this is stimulated by sexual excitation. However, it can also result from mere physical
contact or a sense of well-being, closeness, friendship, love. In most instances, as one begins to experience the
build up of that orgasmic energy, they choose to maintain it for only a second or two before quickly releasing it from the
body via the process of ejaculation. Imagine being able to hold on to that climatic energy for as long as you like - 2 minutes,
5 minutes, 10 minutes, 20 minutes, 1/2 hour, 45 minutes - or even longer. Is this possible? Oh very much so! Even
more magically, you can learn to channel this energy from the area of your genitals (where it is often "trapped")
throughout the rest of your body so that you experience the orgasm - the arousal energy - the climax - in your stomach, chest,
arms, hands, fingers, thighs, legs, feet, toes, shoulders, neck, face, all the way up your spine into the very top of your
head and your scalp. I believe that feeling this surging, climatic, arousing energy move and swirl and flow throughout
the very core of your being is one of the times when (from a vibratory level) we are closest to feeling "divine."
While this is not always the easiest of feats to attain on your first attempts, learning to move and to channel this erotic
energy throughout your body is such an estatically enjoyable sensation that each time you practice it, it becomes more and
more natural. If it is appropriate to the circumstances of your session, I will help to guide you through these
steps. However, not everyone responds to physical nurturing in the same manner. For many men, the process of this physical
excitation leads to a totally different sensation of pure euphoria, one in which the sexual and erotic energies simply move
throughout the entire body on their own accord, naturally and easily, so that the "urge" to ejaculate never comes
to fruition.
What if I have specific needs or concerns to be addressed?
Included with the information contained on this site is a copy of my "Preliminary Questionaire." Through your responses
to this questionaire, I will gain a better understanding of your previous experiences with both bodywork and guided deep relaxation.
Your answers will also provide me with a better understanding of your own particular needs and preferences. This information
is paramount to providing you with the very best and most rewarding experience possible.
How long of a session should I consider?
While I do offer sessions which run from 1 to 6 hours in length, I suggest that your first session should be either
1 hour or 1 1/2 hours long. This length of time will provide you with a wonderful first exposure to the intensity and depth
of my work. Please allow yourself at least an additional 1/2 hour in time for pre-session questions, post-session showering,
etc.
Can there be any harmful side effects from receiving a therapeutic full-body massage?
Tense muscles are often sore and may hurt a little bit when massaged. Sometimes there is a delayed soreness after a session.
Take a hot shower or bath and drink plenty of distilled water to remove any waste products flushed out during your session.
This is especially important after your first massage. The more that you receive bodywork, the less likely you are to experience
post-session soreness.
What other information would be helpful in preparing for a session?
I recommend that you eat somewhere between 1 1/2 hours to 3 hours prior to the start of your session. This will allow time
for your food to digest properly prior to your session and will permit your digestive tract to return to a more restive state
during the session. This will also help you to avoid excessive hunger during your experience. There's nothing like a growling
stomach to pull you out of a state of deep relaxation. I also suggest that you avoid caffeine for 2 to 3 hours prior
to your session. Having to hop up from the table to make frequent trips to the loo can be very distracting to your experience.
Frequently Asked Questions (OAIN)
Sensual & Erotic Massage Instruction Videos
contact me for more info
|